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Re: Adios Landlines

by mulebone » Tue Apr 01, 2014 2:13 pm

Y'know, when pay phones started disappearing I didn't hear too many complaints. I also seriously doubt that the legion of cell phone addicts give much of a shit about "the poor or the old or the crazy." I really find it hard to believe that any of the meaty smart phone attachments that I see sitting transfixed at their phone altars ever lift their heads up long enough to notice that there are any poor or old or crazy people around.

A few years back I was driving home from work when I lost my brakes. Managed to get the car into a restaurant parking lot. I went in and asked the girl at the cash register where their pay phone was at. She looked at me kind of funny and said something like 'I think it's around the corner.' Instead of a phone I found the outline of where a phone used to be. Then I walked to a police station that was nearby & asked the cop behind the desk if there were any pay phones within walking distance. He gave me the same odd look. He asked me why I needed one & then offered to call my wife for me. Without that cop I 'd probably still be sitting in that parking lot.

For a few seconds I think I hated every cell phone user on the planet. Passionately.

I still refuse to get a fucking cell though. Stupidly stubborn I suppose.

After rereading that hunk of bullshit, I see that I could have saved myself a lot of pointless typing by just writing this:

THOSE DAG BLASTED KIDS & THEIR INFERNAL CONTRAPTIONS.

Better yet, let's try it from a different perspective:

Y'know, when public hitching posts started disappearing, I didn't hear too many complaints. I also seriously doubt the legion of horseless carriage addicts give much of shit about "the poor or the old or the crazy" cowboy. I really find it hard to believe that any of the meaty horseless carriage filler that I see transfixed at their multicolored stop light altars blink their eyes long enough to notice that there are any "poor or the old or the crazy" cowboys around.

A few years back I was sauntering home from a cattle drive when my horse lost a shoe. Managed to limp her into town. When I dismounted from old Bessie I asked a passing girl where the public hitching post was at. She looked at me kind of funny and said something like "I think it's around the corner." Instead of a hitching post I found two holes in the ground where a hitching post used to be.

For a few seconds I hated every horseless carriage user on the planet. Passionately.

I still refuse to get rid of old Bessie. Stupidly stubborn I suppose. Or maybe I just like to clean up horse shit.....

So this is what it feels like to get old & irrelevant, eh?

It do suck it.

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